One Year

I think I see a difference...I feel a difference and that is what is important. But! I'm done being stuck. And I'm ready to finish this thing! Be ready for some astonishing after photos! :)

Oh, By The Weigh | March 30, 2012

First of all, I'm pretty sure I'm going to win the lottery tonight, so if I disappear from this blog for awhile that's why.

Second, I'm down this week! I lost .6 lbs! I wasn't fabulous this week. Too much wine, not great workouts everyday. But besides that, I would say it was pretty good. And come to think of it, I actually had two great workouts on Monday and Thursday. And I completed my March challenge to do the Planet Fitness circuit at least 2 times each week. The important thing is I'm feeling good! I didn't did let the shock of last week's weigh-in (which I totally didn't blog about) sabotage my motivation.

I'm still missing the thrill of seeing my Weight Watchers weight graph angle downward.

Tired of the straight line stuff.

But, I'm doing better than I have been in awhile. I'm toning up and feeling good about that. I'm eating great most of the time. And I'm getting my activity in. I just need to be consistent and this will work. I want to have that feeling of success again. While I am not where I want to be right now, it is much easier to focus on the potential progress I can make. When my size 12 jeans were a little tighter than I wanted them to be I thought: "I can't wait for the day when these are too loose." And when I realized how far away I was being out of the 180s last week, I thought: "But one day soon I will be 170-something and I can't wait to experience that."

I just have to focus on making this happen for myself.

• I completed my March Planet Fitness challenge. And I love how I'm feeling and can't wait to keep going. I'm ok with the fact that this toning work may make the number on the scale higher for awhile. I like the changes in my body and am excited to see more. 
• I managed to get some activity in everyday this week except Sunday. 
• I got some life chores done (paying bills, updating insurance, etc). My days of avoiding the not so fun stuff are over. 
• I read a lot! And I'm loving it. 
• I tracked most days. 

• Friday: Planet Fitness Circuit
• Saturday: Ran 3.66 miles on the Boardwalk; first half was great - the fastest I've ever done it; my hamstring started cramping at the end (I haven't pushed myself that hard since).
• Sunday: Rest Day
• Monday: Morning - 3.8 mile walk on the boardwalk; Afternoon - 45 minutes on the Arc Trainer, great workout and sweated a lot, made me remember how much I do love my gym workouts)
• Tuesday: Planet Fitness Circuit
• Wednesday: Morning - 2.5 mile beach walk (it's hard walking on the sand); Afternoon - 2 mile walk to the beach and back (included some me time at the beach and love it!)
• Thursday: Morning - Planet Fitness circuit (went around the circuit twice and it was a great workout!); Evening - 1.6 mile walk around the neighborhood
• Friday: 1.6 mile around the neighborhood

•  I want to focus on my workouts this week. After the cramp I got on Saturday I thought I gave myself an excuse to take it easy (although looking back I think I did pretty good). I want to focus on my running though. I want to get a good run in Sunday, Monday and Thursday
• Set a new toning/weight lifting goal for April. I want to do something similar to last month, but maybe include some kettlebell work or something. But I want to take some time tomorrow to write out my goal and make a chart like last month
• Focus on getting more veggies in my evening meals. Eat one piece of fruit each day. 
• Set up a concrete goal for my graphic design work - I want to use the same strategy that worked with my March Planet Fitness challenge, but for the week. It's all part of setting a routine for myself. 

Current Weight: 186.6

The Results of the Planet Fitness Challenge

I completed my Planet Fitness Circuit challenge!! This is the most successful I have ever been at sticking to a weight training/toning exercise routine. EVER. And I'm so glad I stuck to it. And not only that, I can't wait to keep doing more weight training and toning work. :)

I wanted to take some time to debrief this whole process and celebrate why I think it worked so well.

The Challenge

If you remember, the goal was to do the circuit two times per week, with a third time as a bonus. The plan was to just go and do it. And I didn't worry too much about doing it perfectly or making it too hard. I just wanted to get through at least twice every week.

What Happened Along The Way

There was a slight learning curve of course. I had to learn how to set the machine to fit me and remember what a good weight would be for each exercise, while also trying to challenge myself with each new workout. Most days I incorporated the cardio steps in between, but there were a couple times that I didn't. And I liked that. It gave me a quick workout and wasn't just another cardio workout. Some days I would go through the circuit twice. Some days I was really good at pushing myself...some days I took it a little easy. There were days I was completely sore from the workout and other days I wasn't.

I'm sure I wasn't perfect at using the machines, but I think I got better as time went on. Today, for example, I was on the ab machine and a Planet Fitness employee (I actually think he is the owner as he is always there in the morning and I have talked to him a few times, especially when I managed to spill an ENTIRE bottle of water in the circuit area) came over to help me adjust the machine so that it was right for me. I've always felt a little intimidated by trainers/health gym employees, but I wasn't at all this time and I really appreciated the help. And it made me think that maybe one day I will actually have a trainer or do something like cross fit.

The Results

I wouldn't say I notice a HUGE change, but I do notice some difference in how I feel and how I look. The pictures below aren't great...I took them with my phone and in the gym. I'm wearing pretty much the same thing, my tops are both UnderArmor t-shirts, same size, just different colors. (You can see more attempts to take photos of myself here.)

I feel more toned and stronger in some ways. My core seems stronger and I feel like I have more control over my body. Today, I especially noticed how my upper body has gained some strength. When I first started, I would reach a point where I just couldn't lift anymore with my arms. Usually very early on. I never experienced this with my legs quite the same way. I would reach a point where it was really hard and really burned, but I still felt like I could push through. When I first started, I couldn't just push through with my arms...they just couldn't do it. BUT! Now I can push through. I feel the burn and I keep going. So I know I'm getting stronger...and that's a great feeling.

I think my body is more toned...more firm anyway. Things seem to be sitting a little higher...and my posture feels better. My weight is still high (186 this morning) but I knew that when I decided to get serious about this I would probably get heavier before I got lighter. I think this has always been a reason why I shied away from weight training in the past. The results took awhile to see and, AND, the scale would start moving in the wrong direction. My clothes seem to be fitting better. I was back in my size 12 jeans yesterday...they were tight, but definitely wearable. And my other jeans are feeling looser.

Why I Think This Worked

• I set a clear goal: Do the Planet Fitness Circuit two times each week, shoot for three if you feel like it. I didn't just say that I wanted to get stronger or that I wanted to get more toned. I set a clear and attainable goal. 
• I didn't have to be perfect: I'm a recovering perfectionist and when I feel like I can't do something perfect I tend to give up on it. Here, I gave myself permission to not be perfect. I just had to do it. 
• I focused on one thing: There were days I was like: This is going so well, I should try the kettlebell dvd again...or I should try the other machines or something else. But I'm glad I didn't. I feel like I have gained some confidence in seeing this through to the end. Confidence I hope to take into future workouts. And it made it easier to just get up and do it...I knew exactly what was ahead of me.
• I didn't care about the scale: For part of the time it was easy not to think about the number on the scale, cause I wasn't weighing myself, but the second half of the month I was. I forced myself to focus on how I was feeling and how my body was changing instead of being unhappy about the number on the scale. 
• I kept a progress chart: I printed out my goal on the top of a sheet of paper and all the weeks in March and kept track of my progress. I hung it in spot where I would see it all the time. It really kept me motivated. I liked to cross off completed workouts and it made the month much less intimidating, cause two days a week didn't look so hard once it was all laid out.
• Annie Thorisdotter: She is amazing. Check her out here. When I wanted to whimp out I would think of her lifting up really heavy things and how awesome she is. And how maybe, one day, I could be that awesome too! But also, I heard once that it helps to imagine yourself doing the exercise and what that looks like. It does help me.

All and all I would say that this was a huge success! And I'm very happy with the progress. :)  The month is not over and I could still shoot for my third workout this week. And I'm thinking I will probably try to get that in on Saturday. In the meantime, I'm working on a new challenge for April.

I Wear My Emotions on My Sleeve...err, I Mean, Face

I know we all have our bad mood moments. It happens. And I definitely have those days where I just don't feel like putting a smile on my face. Sometimes Lots of times I lack patience. There are days I need some major me time. I've realized over the past few years that I don't like being told what to do and I don't like having to check in with people. I am fiercely independent and feel I can take care of myself. Almost to a fault.

The hardest part is that I know how much my bad moods, my lack of patience, my intolerance affects other people. And I know I need to reign it in. But, because I wear my emotions on my face I can't hide it. And then I feel bad about it.

I know I am probably way more aware of this than other people, but I still want to work on being a "better person." I know I'm not a horrible person to be around, but I think there are things that I can work on. Like being more patient. Being more tolerant of other people in my life. Saying yes before no. Focusing on the positive. But it's hard. And there are days I just want to go it alone and wish I was in my comfy little apartment all by myself.

I'm having one of those days. Hell, I'm having one of those weeks.

I just need to work on balancing what I feel people expect of me and what I expect of myself and what I really want out of life. I think I struggle sometimes because I am a people pleaser, but also want to be independent and do my own thing. And those two things collide big time. I feel bad when I stand up for myself and I'm not sure I have the skills to do it properly. I don't like how I feel when I know I'm being inpatient or I let people get to me.

I'm not sure there is a point to this post. Just getting my thoughts out there...and realizing there are parts of me I want to work on while I'm working on getting healthy and thin sexy. It's all part of the same thing, right? (Plus, I am currently reading The Happiness Project by Gretchen Rubin and it has me thinking about this a lot.)

So...I'm trying to focus on having positive thoughts and being patient. That way I don't have to worry about wearing my emotions on my face. And I'm working on defining what is important to me and finding the confidence to really go after what I want.

The photos above were taken over the course of four months. I know I'm more likely to play around on Photo Booth when I'm 1) bored and 2) usually in a good mood. But I think I managed to capture some not so great days. I can really see it on my face when I'm feeling blah and when I'm feeling good.

Gym Playlist

SexyBack is making it back onto my gym playlist. It just doesn't get old! Even after being on constant repeat the entire summer of 2007.

Oh, and the gym time has been good. Almost done with my March challenge of doing the circuit two times per week. Only one more gym session away from completing it. The scale is not being my friend, but I like feeling more toned and I'm already looking for ways to expand: Kettlebells maybe...or Jillian Michaels 30 Day Shred (if I can find it in my storage unit). Good times. 

Go Claire!!!

My good friend Claire is running her first half marathon this morning in Queens. Cheering her on from afar!!!

Good luck Claire. Kick some major ass!!! {I know you will!} And I'm buying you a beer to celebrate! xoxo

Sun Sparkles

Sun Sparkles from Andrea Daniel on Vimeo.

Got up early somewhat early to run on the boardwalk this morning. The water was calm and the sun was shinning...creating the perfect little sparkles. It made me smile...and perhaps run a little faster.
Music: The Ghost Inside by Broken Bells

x3

If you remember, this month I've challenged myself to do the PF Express Circuit at least two times each week, with 3 times as a bonus. Well, I got myself to the gym early Saturday morning and got in three workouts this past week! I'm feeling good and I think it is making a difference. Only major concrete evidence I have so far, besides being a little sore, is that I'm so hot at night. Like sweating my balls off hot. Probably my muscles working to repair themselves and get stronger! I like it!!

Oh, By The Weigh | March 16, 2012

The Bad News: I have still not worked up the courage to get on the scale.

The Good News: I'm feeling great and my pants are feeling looser.

I feel like I'm doing things right. My head is in a good place, most of the time. I'm getting in great workouts, consistently. I'm eating great, 85% of the time.

But I'm still afraid to get on the scale. Afraid of what the mental consequences might be. I'm just not sure I'm willing to risk the great motivation I seem to have right now. But I think it might be time. Next Friday I'm getting on that scale no matter what.

Cause even though this journey is suppose to be about getting healthy and feeling good, I'm also doing this to lose weight. I want to be thinner. I want to look better in clothes. I want to feel better about myself. I want to be able to do anything I want to do and not feel like my weight is holding me back, either mentally or phisically.

And I need to make sure I'm moving in the right direction.

I also think that getting on the scale again will help hold me more accountable. It's easier to not track when I'm not weighing in, cause I feel like it doesn't matter as much. It's easier to have that ice-cream after dinner, cause I won't feel it on the scale latter.

Maybe, most importantly, I miss that feeling of actually losing weight and having the evidence right there in front of me. Sure, I think I'm looking thinner, but that is such a subjective thing for me...my mood and how I'm feeling about myself completely impacts my body perception. It's crazy how much it does.

So here's the plan:

• Have a great week. Do what I've been doing and take it to the next level. 
• Food: I'm plan on preparing my own dinners this week. I want to put clean, simple food into my body. I want to provide myself with the best fuel possible. 
• Workouts: Continue running and doing the circuit at Planet Fitness.
• Keep myself busy: I want to make sure I'm working on job applications, practicing my graphic design and being crafty. Also, I want to make sure I'm getting the everyday little chores done (bill paying, doctor appointment making, etc). I'm stressed about life right now and my go to coping mechanism is to avoid all of that. I'm not avoiding life this week!
• Read: I just really enjoyed getting back into reading this past week and it made me happy. I'm going to make time each day to read a book. (Not just blogs!)

On Friday, when I weigh in, I'm going to take my measurement first. I have finally implemented a consistent strength training plan, and as a result I might be getting heavier, but fitter and tighter and thinner. I'm taking measurements first so that I can hopefully see some progress even if the scale isn't exactly where I want it to be.

And most importantly I'm going to work on having faith this week. Faith in myself. That I can do this and I'm making the right choices to get to where I want to be. Faith that it won't happen all at once, but if I keep working towards it (all of it: weight, confidence, life, job) it will happen.

So here is to a great week of doing and not just hoping!

I Love: Planet Fitness Circuit!

One thing I have always struggled with is staying committed to a strength training plan. I think I have always been a little intimidated and I don't really know where to start. I have tried using weight machines at the gym before, but I always feel a little lost. I don't know how long I should be doing a single exercise or what I should next. I lose motivation quickly when there are so many decisions to make. Well! I think I found the answer!

Today was the second day I did the Planet Fitness Circuit. I love it for so many reasons. I don't have to make so many decisions. I just start at #1 and go all the way around. The Planet Fitness circuit works on a red light/green light system. When the light is green you do the exercise, when it turns red you move on to the next one. And that REALLY works for me. I like that there is a beginning and an end...to the circuit and to each exercise. I feel like I'm finishing something. I did what I was suppose to do. I think in the past I never really knew how long I should do each machine and what machines I should be doing. And as I result I didn't really feel like I was doing anything and I quickly lost motivation. Not sure if that makes sense?

Anyway, I'm loving it! I'm even doing the step/cardio exercise between each machine. I thought I would be way too embarrassed to do this in front of other people, but there were like four people doing the circuit this morning and I still did the cardio in between. And I kinda loved it! Oh, and good music on my gym playlist totally helps. I hope to one day challenge myself more and in different ways...take a class or something, but for now I'm focusing on this. I've made a goal to do the circuit two times per week for the month of March and I made a little sheet to track my progress and keep me motivated.

Hopefully this will be the time I really stick to it and build some muscle.

• I returned my running shoes and got new ones yesterday. (Gotta love 90 day return policies, yayy Road Runner Sports.) The pair I originally got was too big and I felt like I was trying to hold on with my toes. Not good when running. I have yet to run with my new shoes, but I will tomorrow morning. I think they will be good! 
• I haven't been great at sticking to my goals this week. Tracking has been terrible, but I'm eating OK. And I haven't been logging the details of my workouts like I wanted. My heart rate monitor hasn't been working for some reason. I'm hoping to read the trouble shooting section of the manual tonight and get back to the plan tomorrow. I still have time left to do it for a couple days!